"… What's the STORY behind these ruins?" If You Don't Let The Past Die, It Won't Let You Live. We are the Beacons of Light, in this Dark World, which will Lead ALL to Jesus! We Cannot Dim Our Light, They Need Us to Show Them the Way Out!
“…What’s the STORY behind these ruins?” (1 Kings 9:6-9 MSG)
“I’m on the edge of losing it – the pain in my gut keeps burning. I’m ready to tell my STORY of failure…” (Psalm 38:17-20 MSG)
Matthew 7:2, “For just as you judge and criticize and condemn others, you will be judged and criticized and condemned, and in accordance with the measure you [use to] deal out to others, it will be dealt out again to you.” (AMPC)
Galatians 6:1-5, “Live creatively, friends. If someone falls into sin, forgivingly restore him, saving your critical comments for yourself. You might be needing forgiveness before the day’s out. Stoop down and reach out to those who are oppressed. Share their burdens, and so complete Christ’s law. If you think you are too good for that, you are badly deceived. Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Do not be impressed with yourself. Do not compare yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life.” (MSG)
Jesus says this in Matthew 5, beginning with verse 14, “You are the world’s light—a city on a hill, glowing in the night for all to see. Do not hide your light! Let it shine for all; let your honorable deeds glow for all to see, so that they will praise your heavenly Father.” (TLB)
Anybody that knows me, knows how much I love dogs! You see, I’ve had them all. Every breed, every size! In a nutshell: I Love Dogs!
However, I have never met a pup quite like my friends Yorkie “Bella”. You see, Bella was not quite easy to get to know. She was such a cutie pie though! So little, so adorable, but not approachable at all! In my experience, most dogs run up to you when you come to the door, even if you are a stranger, and they are usually all over you. But Not Bella! She ran the other way and cowered in the corner! No matter how gentle, or how friendly you were to her, it did not matter. As soon as she saw someone coming, she ran in the opposite direction! She refused to come out of her corner for anybody! “Strange dog,” I thought. However, that was until my girlfriend explained that Bella had been terribly abused by her first owners. So, when she saw people, she saw pain.
You could not understand the way Bella ACTED until you knew her STORY. Unbelievably, but people are like that, too.
You watch how they act, how they treat people, you see the bad attitude they have, and you say, “I don’t know what her problem is, but I don’t have to deal with her foolishness! I don’t know why he woke up on the wrong side of the bed, but I will not be treated like I was his aggravating alarm clock that disturbed his beauty sleep!” Or, you respond with the same garbage they just dished out to you. So often we judge people with little, distorted, or no information at all! We see what they do and assume that’s who they are. But rarely is that ever the case.
I’ve discovered that the “make a difference” people in this world, the healers, are the ones who never forget this critical issue in dealing with people: YOU CAN’T UNDERSTAND THE WAY THEY ACT UNTIL YOU KNOW THEIR STORY! AND EVERYBODY’S GOT A STORY!
I remember discovering how wrong I had been about some of the women in my leadership group, AFTER many of them poured out their hearts at our women’s retreat. Late into the night, people you thought you knew, revealed the pain in their background. Some of the women who were “distant” were physically, mentally, verbally, and sexually abused. Some of the women who had “bad attitudes” suffered from varying mental illnesses (such as depression). Some of the women who “dogged men out “, were in relationships that treated them like property instead of like a person. Some of the women who didn’t like to be a “part of our social gatherings“, were actually ex-alcoholics, and although our events had no alcohol at them, for them, just being in a place with a lot of people, laughing, joking, having fun, listening to music, all gave them urges to need a drink (since that was mostly the settings when they did drink). They were simply trying to avoid the triggers that have shot them in the past!
In other words, suddenly the lights went on and I said, “So that’s what I’ve been seeing all these years! It had nothing to do with their personality, just their personal, private, painful past.” I felt bad that I had been responding to them based on their deeds, and never considered the needs behind those deeds.
“Every cry has a story behind it, some chapters are quick, and you find out right away, but then some of you have to wait it out until chapter 40 before you figure it out. Either way, every cry has a story behind it.”
And the truth is, there are some people that we meet daily (in our homes, churches, work, school, supermarket, laundromat, hair, and nail salon, etc.…) that are “crying”. But unfortunately, we get so frustrated because we do not know why they’re crying that we simply ignore the cry or wait for someone else to come and pick them up and figure it out. I can’t even imagine the amount of people who have left our churches because they were “crying” and no one took the time and patience to figure out why. We were so busy being frustrated by the “noise” of their behavior, attitude, ways, and words, that we did not listen for the story behind the act of ‘crying’.
Problem is, we are too busy reacting, instead of listening. Which recalls Ephesians 4, beginning with verse 29. He says, “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up, according to their NEEDS, that it may benefit those who listen” (NIV).
In other words, do not say things that will tear a person down, only things that will build that person up! Why? Because you are focusing on their NEEDS, not their DEEDS! The word “need” is defined as “something required because it is essential or especially important; expressing necessity or obligation; circumstances in which a thing or course of action is required.” And despite what their deeds may have been, there were needs that they stemmed from (if only we would take the patience and time to figure them out). And according to Scripture and the very definition of the word “need”, this is what God is requiring of us, as essential for them.
Listen: Whether that person is your child, your spouse, your parent, your friend, your coworker, or someone at church, their response is more about their need than their deed. And no matter what their response, your reaction is to meet their need! You are to love them enough to listen to their story until you can find the chapter their stuck in that needs and requires your help. Are you obligated to do that? Absolutely! “You are your brother/sisters’ keeper!” John 13:35, “By this everyone will know that you are My disciples, if you have love and unselfish concern for one another.” (AMP) The Message Bible says it like this, “Let me give you a new command: Love one another. In the same way, I loved you, you love one another. This is how everyone will recognize that you are my disciples—when they see the love you have for each other.” (VSS. 34-35 MSG). Then 1 John 4:20-21, declares, “If anyone boasts, “I love God,” and goes right on hating his brother or sister, thinking nothing of it, he is a liar. If he will not love the person he can see, how can he love the God he cannot see? The command we have from Christ is blunt: Loving God includes loving people. You’ve got to love both.” (MSG)
And no matter how badly they have ACTED, you must love them enough to hear their STORY and be concerned enough to help them write a new CHAPTER! You cannot love God and not love people! God, Himself calls you a liar!
Listen: If You Don't Let The Past Die, It Won't Let You Live. Some people have caused their death through stress because they continued to live in their past, things that happened to them, they continued to re-hatch or hit the replay button day after day, people have suffered strokes, diagnosed with cancer, suffered from heart attacks because they could not let their past die, they could not live. They struggled with jobs, marriages, health, and other areas of life because they could not let their past die. Unfortunately, we did not know their story, or we walked in on the wrong chapter and made a bad judgment call; however, we can help them write a new chapter by not judging and we can help them move forward today.
Listen: If you knew their story, you would understand that many have been made to feel worthless for much of their life. So, they make choices because they are viewed as trash by some (especially those closest to them). And that is one of the hardest battles to be won, is helping a person get past their past, and to forget what they keep recalling. You must love them Forward! Your love for your brothers/sisters needs to be progressive (which is defined as, ‘proceeding gradually or in stages, engaging in or constituting forward motion’)! They will never get to where they need to be if they remain stuck where they are. And sometimes that means we must be their “pen” of inspiration. When they feel the horror story is how it ends, we need to step up to the “desk” and say “oh no it’s not! There’s another chapter in you and we’re going to write it out!” They need to know that their character doesn’t die here; this is not the final chapter; the story is not over!
No Matter How They ACT, You Are Responsible to Stay In CHARACTER! Never ACT Out of CHARACTER!
Now, if we’re being honest here, we’ve all been in situations where we wanted to (and some of us did), treat other people the same way they treated us! After all, no one smiles at the person they held the door open for, and when they walk through, they never parted their lips to say thank you. No one is happy about a person they’ve helped, that treats them harshly in return. But does that give you reason, justification, license, or excuse for us to Act out of Character? Absolutely Not! Ephesians 4:26-27, “Go ahead and be angry. You do well to be angry—but don’t use your anger as fuel for revenge. And don’t stay angry. Don’t go to bed angry. Don’t give the Devil that kind of foothold in your life.” (MSG); Then Matthew 18:21-22 shares, “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, when someone won’t stop doing wrong to me, how many times must I forgive them? Seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you; you must forgive them more than seven times. You must CONTINUE to forgive them even if they do wrong to you seventy-seven times.” (ERV)
1 Peter 3:9, “and never return evil for evil or insult for insult [avoid scolding, berating, and any kind of abuse], but on the contrary, give a blessing [pray for one another’s well-being, contentment, and protection]; for you have been called for this very purpose, that you might inherit a blessing [from God that brings well-being, happiness, and protection].” (AMP)
Romans 12:17-19, “Don’t hit back; discover beauty in everyone. If you’ve got it in you, get along with everybody. Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says God. “I’ll take care of it.” (MSG)
And My Personal Favorite: Matthew 5:38-42, “Here’s another old saying that deserves a second look: ‘Eye for eye, tooth for tooth.’ Is that going to get us anywhere? Here’s what I propose: ‘Don’t hit back at all.’ If someone strikes you, stand there and take it. If someone drags you into court and sues for the shirt off your back, gift wrap your best coat and make a present of it. And if someone takes unfair advantage of you, use the occasion to practice the servant life. No more tit-for-tat stuff. Live generously.” (MSG)
Are You Getting This?! Your Only Reaction to Their Response is Love!
You must step in their shoes, after all, that’s what Intercessors do. They fill the gap, step in the middle, and carry a load that’s killing somebody else! And the truth is, maybe their story includes some awful hurt that has turned them hard, just so they won’t get hurt anymore. Maybe there’s some morally dark chapters in their past that can make them critical and legalistic today because they hate what they used to be. They may wound because they’ve been wounded. Remember: “Hurt People, Hurt People” Somewhere behind the way they act is a story of a perfectionist parent, trust lost because of abuse, the absence of a father’s love, abandonment, failure, tragedy, and the like. So, stop judging their story, intercede instead, and simply help them to write a new chapter!
Stop concerning yourself with what they’re drinking; what they’re smoking; how long they’ve been fornicating; how many tattoos and piercings they have; why the marriage ended; why they didn’t finish school; why they left that church; why they dress the way they do; or why do they have 5 kids with 3 baby daddies! Concern yourself more-so with helping them to write their next chapter, instead of being stuck re-reading their last one!
The Bible is clear, “…Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” (Ephesians 4:31 NIV) Which for many of us, that has been our response to their deeds. But instead, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as Christ in God forgave you.” (vs. 32 NIV) That’s how we’ll respond if we operate, trying to understand there are needs beneath those deeds; there’s a history behind those hang-ups.
One thing I can tell you from a lot of years of learning what’s inside people – when a person is the hardest to love, they need your love the most! And that’s when you ask Jesus to release His love through you because your love just isn’t enough. React to their bad attitude or their bad treatment, and you can be just another person who just wounds an already wounded person more. Respond with the mercy, the grace, and the compassion you received from Jesus, and you can be part of healing that wounded person. Everybody has a story, and you can help write a new chapter.
Remember the opening text: “…What’s the STORY behind these ruins?” (1 Kings 9:6-9 MSG) Everybody has a story behind their ruins! So do not be so quick to respond and react! James 1:19, “Understand this, my beloved brothers and sisters. Let everyone be quick to hear [be a careful, thoughtful listener], slow to speak [a speaker of carefully chosen words and], slow to anger [patient, reflective, forgiving];” (AMP) If that be our reaction, maybe, just maybe, their response will be our other opening text: “I’m on the edge of losing it – the pain in my gut keeps burning. I’m ready to tell my STORY of failure…” (Psalm 38:17-20 MSG) No one wants to talk to someone that’s not listening. How about today be the day we stop lashing out at the way they ACT, and simply listen to their STORY?
Remember this: “…But that’s not the end of it. There’s MORE to this STORY.” (Daniel 11:27 MSG)
Likewise, there is more to their story as well, and it will be a beautiful best-seller, if only you’ll listen and not judge their story, then let your response and reaction be, “Let Me Help You Write a New Chapter!”
People of God: “Don’t Judge Their Character, Before Hearing Their Story!”
In other words, let us be a beacon of light for others.
Who do we need to be for people who’ve lost so much (in the dark moments of life). Those who feel alone, depressed, disheartened…those whose world has suddenly crashed into darkness, who need someone to be a light – a “beacon” – to lead them to safety.
I love that word “beacon”, it’s defined as “a fire lit on the top of a hill as a signal; a light serving as a signal for ships or aircraft.” Its Old English Origin means “sign.” The word “signal” is defined as “a gesture, action or sound conveying information or an instruction.” Its Italian Origin “segnalato” means “distinguished” from its root “segnale” which means “a signal.” When we as believers become beacons of light for those lost in darkness, we serve as a signal conveying information about our Savior and instruction that He is the Light of the World to follow. And our signal is “distinguished”, which is defined as “having an identifying characteristic.” And what characteristics stand out for us as believers? “But the fruit of the Spirit [the result of His presence within us] is love [UNSELFISH CONCERN FOR OTHERS], joy, [inner] peace, patience [not the ability to wait, but how we act while waiting], kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature together with its passions and appetites. If we [claim to] live by the [Holy] Spirit, we must also walk by the Spirit [WITH PERSONAL INTEGRITY, GODLY CHARACTER, AND MORAL COURAGE—OUR CONDUCT EMPOWERED BY THE HOLY SPIRIT].” (Galatians 5:22-25 AMP) That is what distinguishes us. That is what makes people who are walking around in darkness, look up and take notice of us. They see the light of an unselfish person with personal integrity, godly character, and moral courage that conducts themselves according to the empowering Holy Spirit from within.
In other words, when people (whether saved or unsaved) see us, they should see light! They should see a way out. They should see encouragement, inspiration, empowerment, care, unconditional love and a non—judgmental attitude. They should see someone who simply wants to help guide them out of Gloom and into God. Those starving for help should see the Fruit of the Spirit in us. They should see love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, and temperance. As believers, we are to be beacons of light in this dark world. Philippians 2:15, “so that you may prove yourselves to be blameless and guileless, innocent and uncontaminated, children of God without blemish in the midst of a [morally] crooked and [spiritually] perverted generation, AMONG WHOM YOU ARE SEEN AS BRIGHT LIGHTS [BEACONS SHINING OUT CLEARLY] in the world [of darkness],” (AMP).
So, are you shining light, or throwing shade? Because you can’t do both!
In our text for today, Jesus says this in Matthew 5, beginning with verse 14, “You are the world’s light—a city on a hill, glowing in the night for all to see. Don’t hide your light! Let it shine for all; let your good deeds glow for all to see, so that they will praise your heavenly Father.” (TLB) The word “glow” is defined as “to give out steady light; to have an intense color and a slight radiance.” And the word “steady” is defined as “firmly fixed, supported, or balanced, not faltering or wavering; reliable; regular; continuous; and frequent.” In other words, our lights are always on, they do not turn off! The Scripture commands us, “…DON’T HIDE YOUR LIGHT!” When something is “hidden” it means it’s “put or kept out of sight; concealed; and camouflaged”. Which is very descriptive of some of us, believers, when we’re anywhere else, outside of church! Oh, we’ll shine brightly within the 4 walls of the church, but somehow, we manage to dim-down at work, the salons, the barbershop, supermarket, laundromat, the mall, and most certainly when we’re cut off by someone on the highway! And that word “dim” means “difficult to see, shady, and unclear.” It becomes difficult to see our light when we want to blend in and look and sound like everyone else. When we conform to the crowd, it is difficult to see our individual light. And depending on where we are, what we are doing, and who we are doing it with, we become shady. Our integrity and character become unclear. We are no longer distinguished but indistinguishable. And what is the danger of that? “YOU ARE THE WORLD’S LIGHT…” The world will only see the light that we shine. But when we remain hidden, they remain in the dark. But we are commanded, “LET IT SHINE FOR ALL…” People are depending on us church. And as the Scripture says, “…ALL…” people are depending on us. Every culture, nationality, gender, race, age, rich, poor, single, married, divorced, with kids, without kids, varying religions, they are all depending on us…whether they know it or not. Because despite the popular ideas of “higher powers”, there is only One Power, One Name and One God, that can save them from eternal darkness and His name is Jesus Christ. And we as His followers, named after His name (Christians) are to continuously be the road map that points them in His direction!
We are the Beacons of Light, in this Dark World, which will Lead ALL to Jesus! We Cannot Dim Our Light, They Need Us to Show Them the Way Out!
Today that is my prayer for US! That we will be just a little light that leads someone in darkness to the Big Light! Let us help someone today move out of their dark past, delete the replay button of those memories, and begin to live the life God has planned for them.
Blessings
J.P. Olson
